Lowering the love bar.

A couple of years ago I coached a woman who was desperate for romance.

She’d been without someone for a while, and it was becoming a problem.

It was taking ‘too long’, she’d decided.

But there were helpful tips coming her way.

‘My girlfriends tell me I’m just too critical’ she told me, ‘and they’ve urged me to lower the bar when it comes to partners’.

Sure.

Because that’s how this works, right?

We deliberately create love bars and then we’re bound by them, unless we lower them of course.

One day you just start feeling things for people who used to be totally out of your scope, simply because you’ve decided to do so.

Sure.

Just like we create personal preferences, just like we’ve decided on our height and our ability to learn a new language and our love for playing the piano.

We obviously love spinach because we’ve chosen to do so.

We never visit Switzerland in the Summer because it looked like a good thing to create an aversion.

Sure.

I can’t get over how ridiculous this is.